I Don't Like This Part

I love being a mother. Being Gusi's mom and PapaGus' wife is the best package deal there is out there; I can't imagine being happy without either of them. However, there are parts to this gig that I really don't like. One example is dealing with a sick Gusi.

Last week Gusi was sick with a fever and runny nose. A virus the doctor said. Ok. After he spent the week recovering and getting better he started to develop a cough on Thursday and ran a fever on Friday. His fevers were high, very high and he wasn't getting better with the pain relievers we were giving him. We saw the doctor again Saturday morning, he checked Gusi's ears and said there was a small red spot in one ear, but otherwise he was ok. That night he had his highest fever yet: 103.1 degrees. We called the doctor again and PapaGus said he wanted to do a blood smear to find out if it was malaria that was causing the fevers.

So, just after midnight we climb into a cab to go all the way downtown to the Plateau--the center of town--to search for the 24-hour lab that can do a blood smear for malaria. The ride was incredible for all three of us. Dakar is such a lively city and at night it shows on every street corner. Gusi was excited to see the lighthouse lit up, the planes flying overhead, the moon and the stars. Even though he was miserable, he was so excited to be in a car, driving around at night.

When we finally found the lab we were the only ones there. We filled out some paperwork and were seen almost immediately. They found Gusi's vein without any problem, got the blood and did a QBC test for malaria. We waited in the lobby with a scary movie playing on the tv (I had to ask them to change the channel since Gusi was watching it). Finally they came back: negative. Thank goodness, the best $22 I've spent to fail a test. We got in the cab and came home but the fevers continued through the night.

Today we went back to the doctor's and now he saw an ear infection. Gusi is on the equivalent of acetaminophen and ibuprofen as well as antibiotics. He is tired. We are tired. He is cranky. We are worried. He is getting better a little bit at a time. We are aware that while malaria is preventable and curable, it kills a child every 30 seconds, most of them in Africa. He is smiling. We will take an ear infection over malaria any day.

No one told me it would be easy but I didn't expect to hate this part of parenthood so much. Rocking my son in my arms while he cries to me in pain just doesn't seem fair or pleasant or enough. The bitter may serve to savor the sweet but this is the most bitter part of parenthood so far. Bring on the sweet.